Beach Bum

Today was glorious, so we decided to spend it on the beach. The water was really cold, but I still ran into it at ankle height. And there was plenty of sand for me to put through my fingers.

Daddy tried to dig a little pool for me, but we just didn't have the shovels or the know how to do a good job. So these two older boys came by and helped him out. They didn't have to. They wanted to. Hopefully, when I get to be their age, I'll be as nice as they were.

I gotta tell you, the beach is fun. Mommy and Daddy allowed me to run around and touch almost everything, from rocks to sand to water to wood to blanket to toys. It was as the beach made me free to roam and explore. I can get used to this.

Monterey

Another weekend, another trip. This time, Mommy, Daddy, Grandpa and I drove down to Monterey where we stayed at our cousin's house. It's only a two hour drive, and I got to play with Grandpa in the back seat.

We got there just in time for dinner, and we ate at a restaurant where Mommy and Daddy ate last year. In fact, I was in Mommy's tummy at that time, so actually, even though this was officially my first time there, I'd actually had their food before.

Our waiter was really nice. He gave me a fork to play with. Those things are really intriguing.

Man Night

Tonight, Mommy went out and had dinner with her friends, which left all the men in charge of the house. So we got a chance to do men things, such as:

Watch baseball.

Hey, look, I'm a kid. I konk out sometime around 7:30. So although we men only spent a couple of innings together, it was cool. It worked for me. Testosterone was definitely being thrown around.

Grrrr.

Reading

When Grandpa got tired of chasing me around today, he would lift me up and sit me on his lap on the glider and read me a book. It was great. I got to sit still for a second, and Grandpa told me a story. We all win.

And he told me that, when Daddy was my age, he would lift him up just like he did with me and read to him too. So it's like a family chain we just kept together. Maybe it's hereditary. Maybe it's just a fun thing to do. Either way, I'm honored.

Whoa.

Grandpa Again!

Grandpa flew back in from New York. I heard rumors that he was coming back to play with me, and I'd been practicing. We had a bromance last time he was here, and I remembered.

And when Mommy and I picked him up at the airport, he couldn't wait. Mommy gave him a hug and she put his luggage into the car because he already sprinted into the back seat so we could start playing right then and there.

If I had a pair of hedge clippers on me, I'd snap myself out of this car seat and give him a huge hug.

Horsie!

Mommy came back from Costco with an early birthday present for me: a horsie!

Okay, it's not a real horsie. But it looks like one. And when Daddy presses its ear, it neighs just like a real horsie. And it makes the noises like its walking. And it bops his head up and down. And it allows me to do nice on its mane.

And it'll probably let me sit on it, but fat chance of that happening right now.

It's not real, right?

Right?

Wailin'

When I open my mouth and make a noise, Mommy puts her hand over my mouth and gently taps it over and over again. So instead of making one noise, I actually make two noises, one loud and one muffled.

It sounds like this: "AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh AHH ahh!"

Top that, Simon Cowell.

Ryan's Party

I was invited to my friend Ryan's party today, and I gladly accepted. Actually, I've barely met Ryan. We can't get our sleeping patterns to match up, but today, we played some.

In fact, Ryan's parents set up a sandbox in the corner, and that's where I shined. There were like five other kids in there with me, and everyone was doing their own thing, but together, we rose. I just liked being there with them. I felt accepted. I felt like I belonged.

We should do this again. Can I have everyone's contact information?

Crib Talker

I've gotten into the habit of talking to myself in my crib when I wake up. To Mommy and Daddy, it's just incoherent chatter. But if you were fluent in the language I speak, you'd know that important things were going down.

First I take roll to make sure everyone is present. Teddy bear? Present. Mexican Chicken doll? Present. Knicks Monkey? Present. Wyatt? Present.

Then we go over what I dreamt about last night. Usually it's something tame, usually Yo Gabba Gabba influenced. Then I line up what I plan on doing the rest of the day, as in time of naps, toys I'll play with, cabinets to open and whether or not to tease Mommy and Daddy with some sort of breakthrough they can brag to friends and family about. Then, when we're done with that, I'll give everyone present a pep talk to get them through the day.

At that point, I'll summon Mommy or Daddy to come and get me. But what they take as crying is actually everyone in attendance singing "Baba O'Reilly" by the Who.

Yep. It's true.

Bye Bye, Eh?

Gram and Grampa took off tonight for Canada. They like to take off and go on vacation a lot. I dig that. I mean, I miss them, but I like that they like to explore. One day, I'll be an explorer too.

Daddy told some jokes about Canada that even I knew were lame. Nice try, Daddy. But don't make fun of Canada. After all, they are America's hat.

Sears Photos

Mommy took me to Sears to have my picture taken by an actual photographer and not by a Daddy who thinks he knows what he's doing. Reese was there too with her Mommy.

I think the photo shoot went well. Reese and I did some nice things together, really exploring the space. I hit a couple of moods in my shots but always kept it light. And I worked in some poses that I've been working on. All in all, I did some nice stuff today. Maybe a couple of these will work their way into my portfolio.

New Walker

I've got this new toy that I can hold as I stand up and push it and it forces me to walk with it until I hit something like a chair and then Mommy and Daddy clap and I smile and then one of them turns me and the toy around and we walk again but maybe this time to the wall and they clap again and turn me around again and we go on like this for about five minutes and I only keep doing it because it makes them so happy.

And because I'm a ham.

Riddle

Today, wrapped up in a riddle.

Q: What's green and slimy and endlessly running?
A: My nose.

Here's another one.

Q: What's green and slimy and endlessly wet?
A: Mommy's hands after she cleans me up.

She's the best.

Another Family Reunion

We had another family reunion today, this time for Grampa's side, this time in San Rafael. We weren't there for long, and I met some new people, but what got my attention was watching Daddy have a catch with my cousin Roddy. They both put on their baseball gloves and threw a ball back and forth to each other. They did this for about 20 minutes. It looked like they were having so much fun.

I can't wait to grow up.

Truck Stop

We had a long drive back up to San Francisco from Hollywood today. Lots of traffic. Lots of stop and go. And I just wasn't digging the back seat or the music selection. C'mon, Daddy, you gotta revamp your playlists on your iPod. Pronto.

Anyways, we made a stop in Patterson, CA, wherever that is. We decided to eat at a KFC. It didn't look good and it didn't smell good. And the people there didn't really look too good either.

Daddy saw someone order a dish that had mashed potatoes layered with sweet corn and loaded with bite-sized pieces of crispy chicken. And, oh yeah, shredded cheese and gravy. It sounded good but it didn't look so hot. Daddy quoted one of his favorite comedians by saying it's "a failure pile in a sadness bowl". Sounds about right.

I'll just keep on with my mozzarella stick.

Do Ya Think I'm Sexy?

Mommy took me shopping for toys in Beverly Hills, which is a real nice place. They've got lots of shiny stuff there. And it's all clean too.

What was I saying? Oh yeah, toy shopping. I became infatuated with a toy car that I was wheeling back and forth and then putting in my mouth. But then, a beautiful woman saw me and smiled at me. She was totally checking me out. And then her daddy came by and walked away.

It wasn't until later that I realized that the man was actually her husband. And not only that, but that man was actually Rod Stewart. And you know what? I got it. I could totally see what that hot chick saw in a man that old.

I mean, what I'm saying is that I'd like to look that good when I'm 93 years old.

Extra!

Mommy used to work for Extra!, and she took me to the set. I met all the people she worked with, and they were all really nice. It looked like so much fun to work there.

I even got to meet the host, who I am told is famous, and we took a photo together. I'm sure it'll be framed and put on his wall. Or on his dimpels. Or in the Peach Pit.

Dinner with Mommy's Friends

Tonight I had dinner with some of Mommy's friends. Daddy was there too, but whatever. It was about introducing me, so I absolutely poured it on for them with the smiles and the chatter and the interaction. They ate it up.

Of course, like anyone in Hollywood, I had to make a scene. I didn't want my bottle at the restaurant. Who can blame me? And I was up after my bedtime, but then again, who isn't out here?

I jsut hope the paparazzi didn't notice.

Actually, I hope they did. I'm ready for the rags.

Los Angeles

This morning, Mommy and Daddy woke me up and we drove all the way from San Francisco to West Hollywood. Daddy's on a work trip, and he decided to bring us along with him. Mommy's gonna bring me around and introduce me to everyone she knows and everywhere important to her.

The drive was okay. There's not really much going on off the highway, that is, unless you love gas stops and open land. But when we hit Los Angeles, holy moly. There's lights and billboards everywhere. And cars. And beautiful women.

Did I mention beautiful women?

Because there are beautiful women here. It's like their commune.

All around.

High five.

First Step

Today, I took my first step. It was scary stuff. I felt like I was all alone out there. And I felt like I couldn't trust the world around me. But I did it. And although I fell on my bum right after, it was thrilling.

You're all in trouble now.