Thursday, April 30, 2009

A Dude Who Scoots

I'm getting to the point where sitting still doesn't work for me. I'm an inquisitive man about town. I do not want to be on a need-to-know basis. The world is mine to explore, and I'm determined to let nothing stop me.

So I've begun the process of learning to scoot.

I put myself in a pushup position. I then lean forward and hit the ground face first. Then I pick myself back up and do it again. Before you know it, I've moved five whole inches.

Doesn't sound like much, but it's more than what I had before.

And the stronger I get, those five inches will become a foot. And that will become a yard.

Put ten of those yards together, and I'll have a first down.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Hands...What a Concept!

Coming from a family that's half Italian, I'm learning that a perfectly acceptable way of communicating is by using my hands. Daddy is so good at it, he can sometime communicate with only one finger.

But since I'm almost seven months old but not quite, I'm just working on using my hands.

The first trick I've learned is to high five. That means great job. When someone shows me the palm of their hand, my job is to touch it. Pretty simple stuff. And it gets a great reaction. Good times.

The other trick I've learned is to wave. Waving means hello. It also means goodbye. And I can achieve it one of two ways: by turning my wrist like a windshield wiper, or by opening and closing my hand.

Sometimes, I forget to do it, but I'm learning that adults don't. In fact, they do it until I do it in return. It's a nice tradition.

But here's a dirty little secret: When they wave at me, sometimes I just stare at them, as if this whole greeting thing is a foreign topic to me. But it ain't. I just want to see how long they'll do it until they stop.

The record is 43 seconds.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009


There's something thrilling about having your food fed manually to you. Yes, it's also a form of sloth and gluttony, but still, if you got it, you can't really complain. But I've got these arms and hands that I'm just beginning to control, and when I see things being done to me that I can handle, well, that's just not cool in my book.

So whenever Mommy and Daddy try to feed me, I just put my hands to my mouth. This is my job, I tell them. Let me handle this.

So they put the handle of the spoon in the palm of my hand, and I go on my business of putting food in my mouth.

And my cheek.

And my neck.

And my ears.

And my forehead.

And my hair.

And in my lap.

Hey, I didn't say I was a professional.

Monday, April 27, 2009


Grandpa bought me this basketball hoop, and although I've been taking notes from watching the NBA Playoffs with Dad, I still need a lot of work. I'm no LeBron or Kobe right now. But I'm getting there.

I've heard rumors that Mommy and Daddy were really good on the hardwood. But looking at them, I can just assume it's all that: rumors.

Anyways, I'm working on my form. Actually, I'm working on just holding onto the little basketball that came with the set. Right now, I can lift it up to my chin, at which point, it goes into my mouth.

At some point, I'll dunk it. With two hands. And hang on the rim. Then scream. With authority.

And when I'm done, I'll look at everyone who tried to stop me and eye them down to let them know that they can't. It's impossible. I am a force of nature on the hardwood.

Until then, it tastes good.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Spa Me

So Mommy and Daddy dropped me off at Gram and Grampa’s place, then drove up to Calistoga for a two-hour massage?

What about me?

I’ve got modern-day stresses too!

Sometimes I look around and I can’t find Sophie the Giraffe.

Sometimes I dream that Mommy’s boobies go dry.

Sometimes the poop in my diaper scratches my bum.

Sometimes when I hold myself up, I think that I’m gonna fall right back down, but on a floor of tacks.

Sometimes the pain of teeth bursting through my gums makes my entire body hurt.

Sometimes Xavier Rudd is not on the radio and that freaks me out.

See, Mommy and Daddy, it’s not easy being me either.

So where’s my mud bath?

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Too Last Minute

Look, I don't own a watch. I don't even really comprehend the concept of time. But it seems like I know what I want when I want it, and it usually happens around the same time every day.

At 7pm, I like some boob milk.
At 7:30, I'd like my bath please.
At 7:45 or so, I take down some formula.
And around 8pm, I go to sleep.

That's how I do.

And that's why, Mommy and Daddy, it's not a great idea to make a last minute decision to go out for dinner at 7pm when I've got my own stuff going on that needs attending to. I'm a laid back dude. I don't demand much. I'm just not one for change.

Don't ever do that again!

Friday, April 24, 2009

The Mystery is Over

My new friend has a new name.

Hello Wes. Welcome to this world.

Now go long and get open. I’ll scramble and find you.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Just a Head Cold

Mommy took me to the doctor because she didn’t like the sounds of my breathing. It wound up being nothing. My cold is just in my head and not in my chest. Nothing to see here. Please disperse.

But here’s the disappointing part of it. I had a male doctor. Up until now, it’s been all chicks. Although I got to show off how masculine and macho I am, it’s not the same without the element of flirting attached to it.

Not fair.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Another New Friend

Mommy and Daddy told me today that one of my lifelong friends was born today. Uncle Will and Aunt Kristine gave birth to a baby boy. He has no name as of yet. He was born early, and weighs just 5 pounds, 9 ounces.

I remember when I was that size. I think it was sometime around conception.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Another Announcement

I would like to take this opportunity to proudly announce the arrival of yet another tooth, bringing the number of sharp white boney structures in my mouth to three.

We’re getting there.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Do Over

Now I can verify everything I saw on the way to Santa Barbara, except in reverse. Daddy had to leave early to drive to work, so Mommy and I had to hitch a ride with Gram and Grampa. It took us awhile to get home, but that’s okay. The scenery was beautiful and, this time, I had play friends to keep me awake to see it all.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

People Food

Little by little, I’m eating more and more solids. Although boob milk is still my favorite dish, I’m digging anything that’s delivered to me via spoon.

And after tonight, I’m beginning to get impatient.

Tonight, I watched Uncle Aaron make the most impressive tapas. He cooked abalone to rigatone. He concocted different reduction sauces using the craziest ingredients. He kept each portion small but filling. Each dish looked amazing and tasted even better.

I was only awake for the first couple of them, and I’ve never tasted any of them in my life, but I wanted to.

Come on, teeth. Grow already.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Grampa Happiness

This is a fun weekend. Whatever Gramppa wants, he gets. He deserves it. 60 years is a long time. And the last 40 of it, he’s dedicated his life to his kids and grandkids.

So today, I checked the Thing I have, and whenever Gramdpa wanted to play with me, I was game.

We went into the hot tub and he put me in an innertube. At first I was scared, but then again, I was with Gramdpa. An innertube is a new thing for me. I don’t feel anyone holding onto me in the tub, but I knew Grampa wouldn’t let anything happen to me.

And that’s the point. He’s never let anything bad happen to any one of us.

Thank you, Grampa.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Beach Bummin'

We all decided to hit the beach today and drove to Carpinteria. What a beautiful beach. The sand was pristine as I watched Uncle Shannon build sand castles. Buddha and Katie ran up and down the shore. Grandpa walked into the cold ocean. Petra and I played in the shade.

But, at some point, we all looked out and watched a bunch of dolphins jump in and out of the water. They were really far out and at first, I didn’t really know what I was looking at. But Grampa knew, and he told me where to look.

Mommy, Daddy, can you get me a dolphin?

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Santa Barbara

Mommy and I picked up Daddy from work and headed off to Santa Barbara for Grampa’s 60th Birthday Party Celebration. We’re all gonna be there, including Petra, Katie and Buddha, and we’re all staying at this beach house.

But first, we gotta drive the 350 miles to get there.

It was a beautiful ride down 101. There was plenty to see, such as driving past San Jose and San Luis Obispo and Pismo Beach. We drove past endless forests and countless hills. We drove up the mountains and down to the valley. We saw the sun set into the Pacific. We saw cows graze and motorcycles pass. We saw many different colors together at once.

Of course, all of this is secondhand. I slept the entire way and can’t verify any of this.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

See You Soon Grandpa

Grandpa had to fly back to New York today.

Here's some of the things we did together this week:
- He played on the swings with me
- He played on the floor with me
- He threw me up in the air and then caught me
- He tickled me
- He made me laugh
- He changed my diaper even though he hates doing that
- He gave me a bath
- He fed me
- He took me for a bunch of walks
- He took me shopping
- He kissed me on the cheek
- He put me to sleep
- He taught me how to shoot a tiny basketball into a tiny hoop
- He held me when I needed to be held
- He made me smile

And that's just the short list.

Thank you, Grandpa.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009


This was a conversation I overheard today:

GRANDPA: His poop I cleaned up today was hard.

MOMMY: That's weird. This morning, his poop was smushy.

DADDY: And now it's green. Huh...

And I'm the one considered to be the child.

Monday, April 13, 2009

A Return to a New and Improved Normalcy

After a week of housesitting, we returned back to our apartment. That means a return to my crib, my Exersaucer, my high chair, my entire wardrobe, my bathtub, my carpet and changing table.

I missed them all.

And to add to the goodness of homecoming, Grandpa bought me all the toys for me that I loved the most at Rose's house, like the piano. I'm glad to see that my wink was noticed.

So now I have the best of both worlds.

And, on top of that, he bought me a basketball hoop, which wasn't there but was something I'd been eyeing down anyways.

Yeah, this is gonna be fun.

Let's get it on.

Sunday, April 12, 2009


Today is Easter, which I've heard is a pretty important holiday. Seems that we celebrate how a bunny hides some colored eggs and when you find them, you can open them up and eat some chocolate.

Unfortunately, none of the eggs contained prunes or crushed avocado, I had to sit this one out.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Another New Trick

At certain times in my life, I've had the ability to flap my arms.

And at other certain times in my life, I've had the ability to kick my legs.

But now, at this advanced stage of my development, I now have the ability to flap my arms and kick my legs at exactly the same time.

I look like the cutest jumping jack ever.

Friday, April 10, 2009

I've Got This Thing

I love my Grandpa.

And I love my Grampa.

But recently, when I'm left alone with either one of them, I'm just don't dig it.

I don't know why. And it's not something they've done. It's just...

Look, I just need to cry it out, get it out of my system, and once I do, we're best pals once again and it's on.

From tears to smiles.

As if nothing happened.

It's just this thing, this warming up thing I guess, and I can't explain it.

It just happens.

So don't be offended.

Thursday, April 09, 2009


Today Grandpa flew in from New York to visit me.

It was bittersweet.

I love Grandpa and I can't wait to spend an entire week with him.

But I miss Grandma and when he sang her special song to me, it just wasn't the same. He cried. And I wanted to cry too, but I decided to be strong for him.

But then he tickled my stomach and that made us both laugh.

And that's the point. We improvised, we'll make it work, and we'll smile our entire way through it.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

No More Lonely Tooth

After some more pain and squirming, I am proud to announce that my tooth now has a neighbor, which is just as white and sharp and will fit in nicely within my mouth. It is a valued member of what will soon be a lean, mean chewing machine.

Welcome to the 'hood.

Tuesday, April 07, 2009


Okay, I left something big out of my description of the house we're staying at. Seems here that Rose's best friend is a big white dog named Boo. He's licked me a couple of times with his big ol' tongue that was the size of my entire cheek. And I've ridden his back for a while like he was some kind of weirdo horse. And he's barked at me, not because he doesn't like me but because he just wanted to say, "What up, dude."

If I knew better, I might be intimidated.

But I don't know better.

So for me, he just a very large chew toy.

Monday, April 06, 2009


Mommy and Daddy decided to switch things up a bit. Mommy's friend Erin (and my friend Rose) went on a vacation to Maine for a week, so we're housesitting for them. We're still in San Francisco, but in a completely different hood. Their house is four times the size of our apartment.

And, with Grandpa coming in from New York this week, he'll have his own room to stay.

This has been fun. I'm staying in Rose's crib, and she's got this fancy baby monitor that also has a camera in it. I'm not really digging that because I don't want Mommy and Daddy spying me during my private time, but that's okay. We're guests here.

And there's a long winding hallway which makes a walk a little more exciting and a nice sun roof with a great view of the city and a nice park nearby. There's some good stuff here.

And Rose has a bunch of toys for me to play with. I have toys, but here, there's so many new toys that I haven't played with. So it's like I'm at Toys R Us, trying everything out and seeing which ones work for me.

Like this piano one.



Sunday, April 05, 2009

Petra Night and Morning

Mommy and Daddy went to a wedding with Gram, Grampa, Uncle Shannon and Aunt Vanessa, which meant that I got to spend some quality time with Petra. Our babysitter Susanna watched us as we played in the jumper, conversed with her piggy, took naps, downed our bottles and then throw some blocks on the floor.

And then, because everyone who went to the wedding drank a little too much, I woke up in the same house as her, and in the morning, we played again.

When we're able to read and move around a bit, these sleepovers are gonna be even more fun. Well, for us and not our babysitters. But still, hell yes.

Saturday, April 04, 2009

A Nice Trick

I'm learning quickly that all I have to do is smile and that makes everyone happy. Everyone smiles back and laughs and there's much joy to go around, and it's all caused my the simple motion of me opening my mouth.

That's it.

Just showing my gums gives me the entire world in my tiny palm.

Methinks this bit of information is gonna come in handy later on.

Friday, April 03, 2009

Avocado and Rice Cereal

Avocados are in the shape of a football. When you open them up, they are green. They have a nut inside that you need to take out. You can scoop up the edible part with a spoon. And when you crush it with your fork, it becomes mushy.

But an avodaco alone is kinda tasteless. I mean, it's not bad, but I like what adults do with avocados when they make guacamole. I'm too young for that.

So to help me become an avocado addict like any self-respecting Californian, Mommy's been mushing up the crushed avocado with some rice cereal. It makes it a little thicker without having it chunky. I only have one tooth. I can't chew a thing.

I gotta say it's been working.

Mommy makes it and then puts it into my little blue bowl, then scoops it up into my little red spoon and feeds it to me. And with each bite, I dig it more and more, as demonstrated by my loud moaning between swallows.

Pretty soon I'll demand the salsa in it.

Thursday, April 02, 2009

A New Razor Sharp Friend

All my pain and suffering from teething came to a successful climax today when my gums announced their new addition: my first tooth.

Let me describe it to you: It's small, but I'm a kid, so that's expected. It's hard. It's white. And it's razor sharp. Like so sharp that when I grabbed Mommy's finger and put it in my mouth, she yelped when my tooth nicked it.

At some point, I'll use my tooth for many things, like chewing food up. And for making my already beautiful smile a little shinier. And for making my sneers a little more intimidating.

But for now, my tooth is a brave lonely soldier awaiting his friends to show up to do battle.

I love you, tooth. You were well worth the trouble.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

April Fool's Day

Today is April Fool's Day, which is a holiday where you get to pull a trick on someone and it's all good because you're allowed to do it. You get a free pass.

Like, for example, Daddy pulled a trick on Mommy today by doing something without her asking him twice.

And Mommy pulled a trick on Daddy when she didn't have to ask him to help her find her phone because it was right there on the table.

But I had the best trick of all.

When Mommy and Daddy went to change my diaper, they saw that my poo poo was green and not brown. And then, when they looked at it with surprise, I then peed on their hands.